One of the biggest myths is that you have to have your life figured out before you can speak into others lives.
I have a few facts for you. No one ever has life figured out, no one ever has their faith all figured out. I watched an interview with Charles Stanley by his son Andy on His 85th birthday. He said his dad called him and said “I sure would like to find someone that is ahead of me so I could ask them some questions.” He chuckled and said “dad, I don’t think your going to find them.” It just proves the point that we never have this life figured out.
I know many men that feel like this. “How can I teach my son about manhood and leadership when I haven’t learned it myself?” Well if your willing and are honest with yourself and with them. You can be the example of redemption that he needs to see. Far to often we think we can’t show any insecurity or weakness to our kids, but I think we are giving them a huge disservice with this attitude. If we only show them the perfect example then they will take that with them and when they fall short (and they will) they think its too much and can give up. But if you show them you are not perfect and don’t always have stuff figured out but you don’t let that stop you, then your showing them a real vision of a Godly man that keeps going even in the face of a failure. Perfection is a myth, perfection is damaging to so many things in our lives. Don’t let it be the thing that molds your kids.
So how do you begin this journey if your kids 16, 17, 20? Simple…. start. Just start with honesty and how you wished you had been there in this way for them. But we have to start no matter how difficult it may seem. Its almost like our faith with Jesus. Does He call us to be perfect before we are saved? Does He call for us to wait and get our life in order before we come to Him? No way. We come dirty, messed up unorganized and sinful. Well, we can take that same example into our teaching of our young men. They need to see us leading, trying and growing. It paints a true picture for them to emulate. Coming to them with humility, honesty and a heart for redemption shows them such a true picture of a man.
Men, I am right there with you. It can be scary to take this role if you have never had the example in your life. We can be very unsure of ourselves. Ladies help your husbands here, he needs your encouragement, he needs to know your not poking at his weak spots and pointing them out. He needs to know you believe in him and even if he makes a mistake that its ok and you still have respect for him. You play a much bigger role in this than you think. You have no idea the level of confidence you can feed into your husband by the simple act of believing in him when he may not believe in himself. He needs your respect and your love. See him for the man God created him to be and allow God to work through you to help him get there.