What is love?
I have written about this before but I believe it needs talked about some more. We have so many misconceptions about what love actually is. Each person has a perception of love and how they see it or receive it. We let our society define what love should look like in the movies. We see sex thrown in our face telling us that is what love is. I will tell you what love is all about in a single word.
Yes that what love is. Love is the constant flow of sacrifice, forgiveness and grace. It isn’t the emotional feel good high we get. That is part of it but love is really shown during the hard times when we might struggle to even like someone.
When you care for someone on a level that is unexplainable and in a respectful and God honoring way, special things happen. We see these elderly couples that have been together for 50+ years and ask how? Most times it’s a hard headed determination to love the other. What does that look like in the real world? When your standing face to face in a relationship?
it’s always remembering who you fell for. Who is this man/woman standing in front of you, what is in his/her heart and what you know as facts in yours. We must rely on the invisible connection to that person to maintain the love we bonded together at the beginning. That invisible connection is God. God is the only one that can give true love in an unconditional, totally sacrificial way. The only reason we can love is because God first loved us. If God isn’t there then we fall back to lust or affection or all the surface things that society sees as love. Do you see the change there? It’s gone from sacrificial and what you can give to what you can get. When love is done with out God it becomes selfish and reaches to suck all it can to fill a gap inside that person. You see people with obvious bad people all the time and they state.. But I love them… No I don’t believe that. That person is filling a gap, a need and they get afraid of being alone because that void is too great.
Love is just like the verse says.
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
So I ask you… Are you loving your partner the way you should? Is your pride or ego in the way? What are the barriers you have that are keeping that kind of love away?
The key is trust. And the first part of trust is vulnerability. You must show you trust this person with your very life or in this case you heart. You literally are handing someone a map to the ways to hurt you the most and trusting them not too. So I ask you today. Are you loving as God instructs you to or are you only giving what you think you need to to get by? With God there is no half way. You can not sit on the fence with God because the Devil owns the fence. We are human, we make mistakes, we become selfish at times, we let pride get between us and the one we love. That doesn’t mean it’s over. What it means is you must have a heart to forgive and ask for true forgiveness. Let go of all the things that can get in between you. Defensiveness, the need to be right, a open heart to admit wrong, never pointing fingers of blame, never bringing up old mistakes… Hmm. Kind of sounds like the verse huh? Funny how that works.
I know when I get married again I will do it right. I know I will go into it and literally cut the words divorce out of our book, it is not an option. I want to pass that on to my kids too, that same kind of convection to do it right. To put the effort into and come out with a marriage that honors God. The kind that people notice and usually will ask… “Wow look at them, they have it.” The trick is, the it is found by getting through the hard times. When they had to fight as a team against the things that come at a marriage to break it up. You are a team, always. The “it” people notice is also when God is in the middle because the couple knows they can’t do it on their own, that they need to have God as the glue that holds it all together.